I went to a schooling horse show over last weekend. I went with Horse Show Mom and her brood. I'm not sure how I managed motherhood. I should query my own brood as to their interpretations/memories, or not. At any rate it is fun to go hang out with horse people and because it wasn't a "real" show the stress level was waaaaay down. I took care of the magnificent Kilo of previous writings. Such a grown up boy he is turning out to be. He got real tired. That was good. When he was done for the day his little nose was in the weeds hanging over his stall door. He was too knackered to do any of his annoying habits like dancing in place (weaving), biting, striking or neighing. All of this was good as it gave me ample opportunity to be bossy. Also, Steve, I didn't clean any stalls so there. Thanks HSM you were a trooper.
I also got to be a participant, though a blameless one, in the great police take down as we were driving home from Sushi Saturday night. It is some mystery why neither the driver of the car or me noticed we drove half way across town without the head lights being on. Further mystery why there are still cars that you have to turn your headlights on at all. Bad luck that the cop parked at Rite Aid did notice that very thing and pulled us over. He was a cute little thing. He also did not detect any drunkeness and so we chit chatted awhile and soon enough he told us that he was just giving a warning and let us go. This was probably the last bit of good luck for the year so it seems prudent to share with y'all.
On the way home from the show one of the dawgs of HSM vomited all over my lap. May I say right here that I was not amused and may I also say that the brood and the mother were very amused? It is hardly believable to say you're sorry and are you alright while peeing down your leg laughing? Exactly. Then, because horse show mom ain't too bright, she called me up yesterday to ask if I would adopt the vomiter! What is wrong with you HSM? Crimenty. No, I did not take him and not for those reasons only. There are many reasons. 1. He's a Jack Russell 2. he's not nearly close enough to death 3. we have three Jack Russells of our own that we don't like and 4. We just spent a small fortune on one of the dawgs we do have at the veterinary and fo sho don't need another.
Perhaps I should regale you with my tale of woe at the Veterinary Hospital the other day. We have a sick dog who needs evaluating from time to time. So I made a two o'clock appointment and managed to arrive on time, nay, early for the appointment. They kept me waiting in the lobby just long enough to be assaulted by the lady who was hawking SPCA t-shirts and since she actually had a 3xxxlt, which is Steve's size I felt obliged to buy one for him and, of course, one for me but not in that size. That bit of commerce taken care of we were eventually escorted by a student to room and the inquisition began as to the status of the dogs health. The fact that the dogs chart is easily three inches thick did not seem to concern her, so she asked all the vital questions like what kind of dog, sex, neutered?, weight, age etc. I patiently answered the obvious and was, as always, simply stunned that the chart wasn't reviewed at a minimum to discover those basic questions. However, the fun was just beginning though I didn't know it at the time. So then we progressed through the basic questions like why were we here? I have a snarky side and it was giving a mighty effort to come out, but I saw no value in antagonizing a student when there are bigger fish to fry. So I quelled my urge and said that Carlos had to come in every year so the real doc can write prescriptions for his meds and his special hideously expensive prescription diet. Because she has to see him at least that often to prescribe in good conscience. I might should mention that when the dog got sick initially, he lived in ICU at this very hospital for about two weeks and our final bill was over $10,000. It makes me twitch to think about. So anyway I have tried to explain to the staff, students, residents etc. that the dog is old and sick and we have limited funds so lets not do any expensive magic ok? At any rate during my interrogation by the student I mentioned that Carlos seems to collapse when he lays down. All the student heard was collapse. I also mentioned that the dog seemed to be much more disoriented since his return from the kennel when we took ourselves off to N. Carolina over Christmas. I also recounted other ailments that this poor dog has like some hearing loss and poor bladder control. In short, the dog is declining and I thought that was pertinent information. But as I mentioned, all she heard was "collapse". After twenty minutes or so of this back and forth about the "collapse" she finally left me alone and went to confer with her "boss" the resident.
Remember that 2 o'clock appointment? Well at 2:50 the student poked her little head in and said she was sorry about the delay, but Dr. Self Important would be along shortly. I said I was not amused and when offered an appointment I fully expected that my dog would be seen sometime close to the scheduled time. So the student got all wide eyed and informed me that this was a teaching hospital and therefore niceties and promptness had no place here. To which I replied, this would never happen in the real world and that my tenuous hold on my patience was at risk. So she wisely scooted out and about 15 minutes later the snarky Dr. Self Important came stomping in and thanked me, in that tone, for my patience. I said I was all over being patient and keeping someone waiting (me) for that long was not respectful and I resented the disregard she/the hospital had for my time. And then I stared at her. And she explained to me that I should know that all appointments will take all day. Then she told me I should have received a letter explaining all this to me. To which I replied that I'd not received any communication from her/hospital except for bills in the over thirty years I'd been coming to this facility. And further what was her point? I was here to have the dog looked at, not to discuss her poor time mangement skills. Well, Dr. Self Important did not like that one bit, but she agreed the dog's health was the issue and so she then began to ask me about the dog. She pretty much asked the same questions the student had, but was a little more concerned about the collapsing. I told her it seemed like a weakness in the hind end, but I was also concerned that he just would collapse in odd places like in doorways and the middle of the hall, not normal for Carlos who really used to like to have cover from the insurgents that were bound to attack at any minute and would always have a wall behind him covering his flank.. No doubt the dog was military in a previous life. I'm just guessing here that none of what I said had any impact on Dr. Self Important because the next thing I know she's scheduled the dog for about $1000 in blood and urine tests, ultrasounds and x-rays.
It seemed to me that that might be a bit much considering our usual financial status. So I called Steve and told him what was being proposed to which he said (and I quote) "tell them to f*** off". And I recommended that he talk to Dr. Self Important and get her take on it and so he did and since he hadn't been sitting in an ugly little room for and hour and a half by this point, he had a lot more tact and patience than I did. And by time the doc got through with him and guilt tripping him about the dog the testing was approved and Carlos was hauled out of there for his tests. @#%&*. The results were that the dog (still) had diabetes and probably (still) had Cushings and all the other stuff was within normal ranges. So there you have it. The vet will not call me back, opting, instead, to deal with Steve. Steve calls her Dr. Girl Friend so you can just imaging how that galls me and I have sworn off going to the vet school alone for the dog and I insist that Steve always take the damn dog in himself, because afterall it is his dog. Sucky. I feel so much closer to you after sharing.
I rode this week. I do not have a lick of sense so on Wednesday I rode three horses in a row. The next day I was crippled, but rode one anyway. Then I left and had my car smogged, bought some coffee beans and some shampoo (which I should use btw) and came home to discover that I could feel my back spasm and my abs scream. Perhaps I should pace myself. And go to the gym as often as I think I do. Whatever. It was nice to have someone get the horses ready so all I had to do was get on. I could get used to that convenience. There is a description of getting a horse ready to ride in a posting I made called "It's Windy Today" if you feel you need clarification. The long and short of it is you could spend your whole riding time allottment just getting ready to ride and never actually have the chance to get on ride.